The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again
asked readers to take
any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding,
subtracting, or changing one
letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this
year's winners. Read them
carefully. Each is an artificial word with only one
letter altered from a
real word. Some are terrifically innovative:
1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund,
which lasts until you realize it was your money to
start with.
2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid
people, that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The
Bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of
breaking down in the near future.
4. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which
renders the subject
financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.
5. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
6. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic
wit and the person who doesn't get it.
7. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you
are running late.
8. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
9. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got
extra credit.)
10. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending
off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like,
the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
11. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting
through the day consuming only things that are good
for you.
12. Glibido: All talk and no action.
13. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to
seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
14. Arachnoleptic Fit (n.): The frantic dance
performed just after you've accidentally walked
through a spider web.
15. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito,
that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning
and cannot be cast out.
16. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding
half a worm in the fruit you're eating.
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